Hello... please be patient while the site loads :D ~daph
31.8.07
thanks. i've a lot to thank for really. thanks to all the people who've added joy to my life. u r really gems. thanks to those who've hurt me and made me stronger. toast to the people who made me learn anger management. hoho.
i'm sorry for any hurt i've caused, for any unintentional pain.
i wish u all peace and love. rmb i didn't leave anyone out in this wish.
be good stay strong. :D
-daph (7:20 pm) >>*
25.8.07
oh my goodness. something big must've happened. since daph is blogging.
yea. crazy. haha.
read someone's blog today and got really inspired to write something.
long, i'm so glad that day when i read ur 'goodbye' to BB. I'm so glad u've finally let go. finally living like u should. Even though i must say i was indeed shocked at what u told me abt what u call ur ugly past, the long i know is a good guy. u can't change the past, but make sure u make the future a good one. I was so happy for u that i even smsed u, my dear fren that i haven't been speaking to for some time. i do miss u... i promise to look for u when i'm free. i will! and i feel so ashamed to say that after all that advice and listening, i still make the same mistakes myself. (which is why i knew exactly how u felt back then) but i'll keep my promise and hope i'll be happy too. ----------------------------
i realise that i've many frens who are a lot like me. in terms of the way we think and how we seem on the outside, and what we really are inside. it's good and bad really. we understand each other well, but we're bad influences of each other too. cos we'll continue moping, thinking it's just normal when it's not. not really anyway.
---------------------------- To a really good fren, or one whom i think is, hope still is. i'm really sorry for having been so stupid. i couldn't help it. trust me. i dunno if u can ever imagine leaving someone so close to u. i really couldn't let go. but i guess i hurt many ppl along the way, especially myself. forgive my stupidity. though this is probably of no consequence to u anymore. somehow reminded of deborah how saying "when one door closes, another opens, but the giraffe is too busy staring at the door it wanted to enter, it didn't realise another has opened." Yea, and honestly, i personally think it's far too late as well. i don't want to live like the selfish brat i am.. i'm not even confident of myself, what if i run away in fear or something else? i hate to make another mistake and cause someone else misery.
i hope u didn't think that i was tricking u, or wasting ur time. i'm not having fun. i just wanted to know how u feel, and i got scared again when u made up ur mind. so typical of me. shoot. i'm so confusing myself and others around me. i hate it! i know this'll never come by again, i want to say yes. But what if i'm just a bloody bitch again, i must say no. but i don't want things to become weird. ok shit.
---------------------------- to AER.. (who won't be reading) i've thought about it. 3rd and (best? i dunno, maybe. but definitely most important so far) too, like what u said of me. choosing to rmb what i hope will be the best of my memories. i've been through so much pain. and u know too. i couldn't let go. i'm going to find me again. and leave everything to fate. i'll not reveal my plan ahead of me, i dun think u need to know. seriously will try to forget and when i stop the pain, i'll be happy again. you be happy too. best frens right? (: but to quote "15", there's no such thing as eternal friend or foe. You just enjoy while it lasts. and at some point, our paths could deviate or cross. i don't know.
------------------------------ to someone whom i really wanna say this to. but u'll never EVER guess. i miss u. only today did i realise it was never a little girl's crush. ur now someone enshrined in my heart. i know we'll never be. unless some really random twist of fate occurs. but i smile when i see u, when we talk. it seems to bring me back then.. then when all was of no worry. guess u'll never guess what an impact u have on me. i never did either, now i know. but i don't desire anything else. ur just a childhood dream. something good, but something u know not to claim. and not to take too seriously, as it isn't real.
------------------------------ to ppl whom i've hurt. when i was young and naive. and stupid. (oh wait a minute, i still am)
i know i was REALLY a terrible, horrible disgusting git. i just wanted attention, i got it and threw it away. i hate me too. and some of you out there, who probably won't be reading this ANYWAY. probably remember and hate me for life. i realise how much of a bitch i was. how stupid. so guess what, guys? be happy cos i'm suffering from retribution. i am. now i hope all of you are happy with ur lives, cos i believe everyone deserves someone good for themselves, it definitely wasn't me, cos i hope u'll all get someone better for urself. i'm really sorry. and rest assured i'm not victimising anyone else anymore. i'll end it early and nicely if i find it won't work, never giving them too much hope. and i don't mind ending up as an old spinster next time for it. -------------------------------
haha. exciting, ain't it? i'm so screwed up. "a sorry piece of crap, i am"
-daph (3:08 pm) >>*
Daphne Tan; Singapore; Chinese; 17+; HCI; Buddhist; Aresian;
29031989; emotional; lazy; hungry; dreamer; loves: sleep; food;
music; dance; lights; webdsign; Korea!; dislikes: hypocrites;
gossips carried too far; stress; preachers;
(more? leave a question in the chatbox)
